Even though we may want recovery from our eating disorder, or disordered eating, or body shaming, and even though we may think it is a priority to get help and address this, our actions may not be following suite.

In today’s post I want to share with you 2 ideas to bring you back to a place of hope in your eating disorder recovery.

I recently listened to a podcast by Dr. Henry Cloud titled “The two keys to accomplishing anything.”  I will post the link, but please keep reading before you switch over and listen.

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-dr-cloud-show-the-two-keys-to-accomplishing-anything/id1488880049?i=1000651116477

I was very intrigued by this title as I have been trying to accomplish something in my life but it is just not getting accomplished.  Frustration with my situation drove me to listen to this podcast with a very open mind.  Why, am I not getting this accomplished?

My initial thinking revolved around codependency.  Am I not getting this thing done because I don’t know how to give myself time to do things for me?  As I sat down to write and reflect, I realized that when there is something that I know how to do, and am motivated to do it, I can and usually do it.  Perhaps the problem is that I don’t know how to do it, and therefore I avoid.  BINGO.  Yep, that resonates with me.  As I continued to reflect I also noticed myself acting from a place of all or nothing thinking.  I either know how to do the entire thing and do it, or I don’t know how to do it and don’t do anything at all.

Perhaps my recovery friends can relate. 

Idea # 1 To Bring You Back to a Place of Hope in Your Eating Disorder Recovery

A priority in your head may not be a priority in your behavior because you don’t know what to do or you don’t know how to do it all the way through (all or nothing thinking), so you avoid and do nothing. 

Dr. Clouds podcast provided a great reminder to me, which was very timely.  Priorities mean things that go prior to.  Ah.  Let me sit with that for a long minute.  If I don’t know how to do something I am not typically going to put that before (prior) to the easier more comfortable things in life that I do know how to do.  This leaves me with the lingering stress that I still need to take care of that thing. 

Do you have lingering stress over needing to care for or tend to your own eating disorder recovery?

Why am I writing about this, and how does it tie into eating disorder recovery? 

Here are a few key points I want to make.  Even though we may want recovery from our eating disorder, or disordered eating, or body shaming, and even though we may think it is a priority to get help and address this, our actions may not be following suite.  Why?  Well you might very well be stuck (like me) in not knowing what to do.  Where to start?  Who to reach out to?  If you ask yourself if getting help from your eating disorder is a priority in your life, and you say yes, but you find yourself not getting the help, is it because you do not know what to do and are therefore avoiding it all together?  A little all or nothing thinking like me?

While I have had things in my head as priorities, my actions did not make them so.  Why not?  Well let me just say that just because something is in my head as a priority, does not mean that I know how to do it.  This is an insightful nugget.  I haven’t really thought about that before.  I have something that is a priority in my head to take care of or tend to, and I do not take care of it because I do not know how to take care of it.  And therefore, I do nothing!  This leaves me with the lingering stress that I still need to take care of that thing.  Do you have lingering stress over needing to care for or tend to your own eating disorder recovery?

If this is resonating with you then keep reading…

Idea # 2 To Bring You Back to a Place of Hope in Your Eating Disorder Recovery

What is the next right thing that you can do to head in the right direction?  A small step is better than no step at all.

So say you have lingering stress over needing to care for or tend to your own eating disorder recovery.  If I were to ask you “what is the next right thing that you can do” to head in the direction of recovery (gentle reflection here, acting out of our dysfunction heads away from recovery), what would your answer be?  Perhaps that is where you start.  You don’t have to know how to get all the way through it.  But you sure can take a small step forward.  It is never too late.  I heard a great quote from a dietitian named Jennifer McGurk, “If nothing changes, nothing changes.”

So today I am asking myself, “What can I do?”  Even if I don’t know how to do it all the way through, what can I do today?  A few recovery slogans come to mind, “Just for today” and “do the next right thing.” I am going to add to that recovery slogan today to state “do the next right thing that I can do”.

What that looks like for me is learning from yesterday; the things that I did, the things that I didn’t do, and the things that I was reminded of or learned.  It is the Lords kindness that leads us to repentance.  Not shame, guilt, or fear.  I serve a God of second chances (and beyond).  His faithfulness fuels this.  And for that I am so very grateful.  I don’t have to stay stuck.   

An invitation to a small action step foward…

I invite you to put on your curious George curiosity (leave the shame and judgement out) and honestly examine whether your eating disorder recovery is a priority to you in both your head and in your actions.  Then allow yourself a few minutes to reflect on your answer.  Keep it simple, set your phone timer for 5 minutes and write down whatever comes up.  If you find that it is a priority in your head but not your actions, then I invite you to ask yourself, “What is the next best thing that I can do?”  Then take the action step.  I am confident that God will meet you as you do. 

May you be blessed with hope as you continue in your eating disorder recovery, one day at a time.